I missed writing last week –oops! Sorry about that…life got busy last week, and I just didn’t get any thoughts written down. I’ll just pretend that you took a week off from reading too, and here we are together again after vacation ; )
I finished up my Whole 30 challenge since we talked last — I think it went really well this time around! I ended up losing 5 pounds, but more than that, I re-set my attitudes about food and what I actually need to eat versus what I want to eat. I realize now that I had gotten VERY carried away during my pregnancy and nursing days and was eating way more than I needed to, and of all the wrong things!
My hubby even got into the challenge about half way through and together we are eating much healthier now. We decided that we don’t even really miss the rice, pasta and sugar as much as we thought we would, and I’m excited to set up healthy habits for us to show baby girl how its done. We have to be able to chase her around the playground now, and we need to be as healthy as possible to keep up with that toddler energy!
It was a good month, but at the end I was also feeling very frustrated that I had only lost 5 pounds; even with 6 workouts a week, I found that I was at a standstill in my weight loss. It was then that I realized that I had fallen again into my mental trap of thinking that if I don’t eat, then I am doing the best thing I can to lose weight! Food and carbs were again the enemy to me. I was waiting until 1 pm or so to eat “breakfast” and even then, it was a granola bar or something small. I would eat a snack again around 3ish and then have a little dinner. I was so focused on having a calorie deficit that I completely shot myself in the foot with my weight loss and health by not giving my body anything at all for fuel.
I had a lightbulb moment when I started reading up on workouts, etc., and they kept mentioning again and again the importance of carbohydrates and keeping your body fueled appropriately so it doesn’t go into its starvation mode funk (now clearly I know that I could legitimately feed off of each thigh for about a week or two, but my body doesn’t realize that!). I felt a huge “DUH” when I got through my reading — the most shameful part is I WENT TO COLLEGE FOR THIS!! My degree is in Exercise Science and Health Sciences and I am feeling like the biggest idiot because apparently I have totally forgotten everything I spent time and energy learning backwards and forwards for five years (yes, I took the long path : P ).
I kept researching and read more on the science of carb cycling, and as I read terms like “glycolysis,” “glycogenesis,” “leptin” and “glucagon” I felt it all start coming back to me (sort of…who ever thought it was a good idea to name everything almost the same thing anyway??). And something else also hit me afresh as I was remembering how everything works — we have an AMAZING creator God who designed our bodies to be intricately functioning machines that do so much! I was always so in awe of how everything in our bodies works together to keep us healthy, strong and chugging along every day — that’s one of the reasons I wanted to study this in the first place.
So, as I refreshed my mindset, I decided to dedicate my health and fitness back to God, where it belongs. Colossians 3:23 says “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord.” In my mind, as a “good Christian” woman, I shouldn’t be concerned with fitness and pursuing a gym routine, etc., because that has become a very worldly thing to do. But God created our bodies to be healthy and strong, and for me to be sure I am caring for what He has blessed me with is a form of worship for me, not a form of worldliness. He has healed me so many time from debilitating pain, and I want to show Him that I am so thankful I can be active again. I have also started to pray about my fitness stuggles, workouts, and my health, which is a new approach for me, but if I want God to be in control of ALL of my life, I need to talk to Him about it!
Now for sure, I still struggle with body image and with trying to look a certain way. I have to constantly refocus back to health and thanksgiving as my primary goals, and not being a size 6 or having “eyecatching abs” or “sexy glutes”. I want to be healthy, but I also don’t want to make that an idol in my life, and thus distract me even more from my Father. 1 Corinthians 6:19 says “do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you?” — as a temple of a member of the Holy Trinity, I want to keep my body healthy and strong to be ready to do whatever work is asked of me. I’m inspired to keep working at this now that my mind is back where it belongs!